After David sinned with Bathsheba, the prophet Nathan warned the king that the sword would never depart from his house (2 Samuel 12:10). As predicted, David had domestic troubles from that point on - betrayal, adultery, incest, and even murder. David never figured out how to deal with the rebellion against him. It was as if his anointing and authority had left him.
No one saw this more clearly than his son, Absalom. When Amnon raped his sister Tamar and David did nothing about it, Absalom grew furious (2 Samuel 13:22). And with every day that David failed to administer justice, his anger grew. Absalom also tried unsuccessfully to get an audience with his father. It was as if David had abandoned his role as the spiritual head of his family.
Eventually Absalom could not bear it any longer. He drew everyone's attention by committing two crimes. First, he avenged his sister Tamar by murdering Amnon. For this crime his father David banished him (2 Samuel 13:37-38). After he was allowed to return, Absalom grew angry at General Joab and set his field on fire (2 Samuel 14:30).
Despite his actions, Absalom did not receive the fatherly attention he so desperately wanted. Once he had passed his inner boiling point, his passion drove him to sabotage his father's leadership. He played politics and persuaded people to bring their grievances to him. And there was more. He lobbied for his own leadership. Finally, he raised an army to rebel against the king, his father.
In the end, Absalom died as an unpredictable leader whose passion had wildly overshot its mark.
Absalom's excessive passion.
Studying his story in 2 Samuel 13-18 brings the following thoughts about passion to light:
1. Passion without perspective brings death (2 Samuel 13:22-29).
22 And Absalom spake unto his brother Amnon neither good nor bad: for Absalom hated Amnon, because he had forced his sister Tamar.
Absalom's revenge on Amnon
23 And it came to pass after two full years, that Absalom had sheepshearers in Baalhazor, which is beside Ephraim: and Absalom invited all the king's sons.
24 And Absalom came to the king, and said, Behold now, thy servant hath sheepshearers; let the king, I beseech thee, and his servants go with thy servant.
25 And the king said to Absalom, Nay, my son, let us not all now go, lest we be chargeable unto thee. And he pressed him: howbeit he would not go, but blessed him.
26 Then said Absalom, If not, I pray thee, let my brother Amnon go with us. And the king said unto him, Why should he go with thee?
27 But Absalom pressed him, that he let Amnon and all the king's sons go with him.
28 Now Absalom had commanded his servants, saying, Mark ye now when Amnon's heart is merry with wine, and when I say unto you, Smite Amnon; then kill him, fear not: have not I commanded you? Be courageous, and be valiant.
29 And the servants of Absalom did unto Amnon as Absalom had commanded. Then all the king's sons arose, and every man gat him up upon his mule, and fled.
2. Passion will find expression, either in a healthy or an unhealthy way (2 Samuel 14:28-30).
28 So Absalom dwelt two full years in Jerusalem, and saw not the king's face.
29 Therefore Absalom sent for Joab, to have sent him to the king; but he would not come to him: and when he sent again the second time, he would not come.
30 Therefore he said unto his servants, See, Joab's field is near mine, and he hath barley there; go and set it on fire. And Absalom's servants set the field on fire.
3. People follow passion more than reason, even when it is unwise (2 Samuel 15:1-12).
Absalom's revolt
1 And it came to pass after this, that Absalom prepared him chariots and horses, and fifty men to run before him.
2 And Absalom rose up early, and stood beside the way of the gate: and it was so, that when any man that had a controversy came to the king for judgment, then Absalom called unto him, and said, Of what city art thou? And he said, Thy servant is of one of the tribes of Israel.
3 And Absalom said unto him, See, thy matters are good and right; but there is no man deputed of the king to hear thee.
4 Absalom said moreover, Oh that I were made judge in the land, that every man which hath any suit or cause might come unto me, and I would do him justice!
5 And it was so, that when any man came nigh to him to do him obeisance, he put forth his hand, and took him, and kissed him.
6 And on this manner did Absalom to all Israel that came to the king for judgment: so Absalom stole the hearts of the men of Israel.
7 And it came to pass after four years, that Absalom said unto the king, I pray thee, let me go and pay my vow, which I have vowed unto the LORD, in Hebron.
8 For thy servant vowed a vow while I abode at Geshur in Syria, saying, If the LORD shall bring me again indeed to Jerusalem, then I will serve the LORD.
9 And the king said unto him, Go in peace. So he arose, and went to Hebron.
10 But Absalom sent spies throughout all the tribes of Israel, saying, As soon as ye hear the sound of the trumpet, then ye shall say, Absalom reigneth in Hebron.
11 And with Absalom went two hundred men out of Jerusalem, that were called; and they went in their simplicity, and they knew not any thing.
12 And when Absalom offered sacrifices, he sent for Ahithophel the Gilonite, David's counsellor, from his city, even from Giloh. And the conspiracy grew strong, for the people increased continually with Absalom.
4. Leaders who follow passion defeat leaders who follow protocol (2 Samuel 15:13-14).
13 And there came a messenger to David, saying, The hearts of the men of Israel are after Absalom.
14 And David said unto all his servants that were with him at Jerusalem, Arise, and let us flee; for we shall not else escape from Absalom: make speed to depart, lest he overtake us suddenly, and bring evil upon us, and smite the city with the edge of the sword.
5. Self-centered passion distorts a leader's judgment (2 Samuel 16:22).
22 So they spread Absalom a tent upon the top of the house; and Absalom went in unto his father's concubines in the sight of all Israel.
6. Unrestrained passion harms everyone near the leader (2 Samuel 17:17-20)
17 Now Jonathan and Ahimaaz stayed by Enrogel; for they might not be seen to come into the city, and a wench went and told them, and they went and told king David; for they might not be seen to come into the city.
18 Nevertheless a lad saw them, and told Absalom: but they went both of them away quickly, and came to a man's house in Bahurim, which had a well in his court, whither they went down.
19 And the woman took and spread a covering over the well's mouth, and spread ground corn thereon; and the thing was not known.
20 And when Absalom's servants came to the woman to the house, they said, Where is Ahimaaz and Jonathan? And the woman said unto them, They be gone over the brook of water. And when they had sought and could not find them, they returned to Jerusalem.
7. When passion outweighs wisdom, leaders sabotage themselves (2 Samuel 18:9,14).
9 And Absalom met the servants of David. And Absalom rode upon a mule, and the mule went under the thick boughs of a great oak, and his head caught hold of the oak, and he was taken up between the heaven and the earth; and the mule that was under him went away.
14 Then said Joab, I may not tarry thus with thee. And he took three darts in his hand, and thrust them through the heart of Absalom, while he was yet alive in the midst of the oak.
Healthy passion.
Absalom stands for a leader who never got his passion under control. When a leader develops passion before he learns submission, problems almost always follow. Does that mean leaders should avoid passion? Not at all! Passion is one of the 21 indispensable qualities of a leader and brings great benefits to leadership.
1. Passion is the first step to achievement.
2. Passion increases your willpower.
3. Passion changes the leader.
4. Passion makes the impossible possible.
Passion helps a leader develop his leadership qualities. It unleashes its greatest power when it flows from the heart of a leader who is wise, responsible, humble, and selfless.