Through good listening, leaders earn the right to speak into the lives of their people. Because they listen well, what they say carries great relevance. In addition, they show love, compassion, and understanding while they listen.
David led well because he listened well. 1 Samuel 26 describes how he got the opportunity to take Saul's life for a second time. David crept up on the king while he was sleeping. But instead of killing him, David took the king's spear and water jug and later confronted him with some questions from a distance. David thereby shows that a leader who listens possesses real love.
- Real love is not always popular - be different.
David's men encouraged him more than once to look out for himself and take Saul's life - but David refused. Leaders must be careful how they interpret circumstances and whose advice they accept.
- Real love needs a clear perspective - be humble.
After David had taken the spear and jug from Saul, he called out to the king from a distance. He humbled himself and humbly asked for an explanation and for Saul's perspective. "What have I done?" he asked. Leaders will never be able to love people rightly if they do not see clearly and with God's eyes.
- Real love is not defensive - it is patient.
David knew that God had brought him into this situation for a reason and trusted that God would also deliver him from it. Because he was not entirely sure whether he had done something wrong, David offered a sacrifice. He also waited for Saul's explanation. Impatience shows that leaders lack trust and insist on their own rights.
- Real love is powerful - be forgiving.
Saul later apologizes to David and admits his wrongdoing. He promises to go home. Since David still has Saul's spear and jug, he forgives Saul and gives everything back. Like David, leaders must also trust that God will set things right.
What steps did David take?
Notice the following steps David took with Saul (1 Sam. 26):
- He made contact with Saul and laid the foundation for communication (1 Samuel 26:14).
- He appealed to Saul's sense of right and wrong (1 Samuel 26:15-16).
- He asked questions and listened to the king's answer (1 Samuel 26:18).
- He asked him to listen so that he could explain his perspective (1 Samuel 26:19).
- He was determined to acknowledge anything he had done wrong (1 Samuel 26:19).
- He submitted himself to Saul (1 Samuel 26:20).
- He offered forgiveness and reconciliation as an act of trust in God (1 Samuel 26:22-24).
How is it with you as a leader? Do you show love for others by listening to them? Are you a good listener?
1 Samuel 26:1-25
David Spares Saul's Life Again
1 And the Ziphites came unto Saul to Gibeah, saying, Doth not David hide himself in the hill of Hachilah, which is before Jeshimon?
2 Then Saul arose, and went down to the wilderness of Ziph, having three thousand chosen men of Israel with him, to seek David in the wilderness of Ziph.
3 And Saul pitched in the hill of Hachilah, which is before Jeshimon, by the way. But David abode in the wilderness, and he saw that Saul came after him into the wilderness.
4 David therefore sent out spies, and understood that Saul was come in very deed.
5 And David arose, and came to the place where Saul had pitched: and David beheld the place where Saul lay, and Abner the son of Ner, the captain of his host: and Saul lay in the trench, and the people pitched round about him.
6 Then answered David and said to Ahimelech the Hittite, and to Abishai the son of Zeruiah, brother to Joab, saying, Who will go down with me to Saul to the camp? And Abishai said, I will go down with thee.
7 So David and Abishai came to the people by night: and, behold, Saul lay sleeping within the trench, and his spear stuck in the ground at his bolster: but Abner and the people lay round about him.
8 Then said Abishai to David, God hath delivered thine enemy into thine hand this day: now therefore let me smite him, I pray thee, with the spear even to the earth at once, and I will not smite him the second time.
9 And David said to Abishai, Destroy him not: for who can stretch forth his hand against the LORD's anointed, and be guiltless?
10 David said furthermore, As the LORD liveth, the LORD shall smite him; or his day shall come to die; or he shall descend into battle, and perish.
11 The LORD forbid that I should stretch forth mine hand against the LORD's anointed: but, I pray thee, take thou now the spear that is at his bolster, and the cruse of water, and let us go.
12 So David took the spear and the cruse of water from Saul's bolster; and they gat them away, and no man saw it, nor knew it, neither awaked: for they were all asleep; because a deep sleep from the LORD was fallen upon them.
13 Then David went over to the other side, and stood on the top of an hill afar off; a great space being between them:
14 And David cried to the people, and to Abner the son of Ner, saying, Answerest thou not, Abner? Then Abner answered and said, Who art thou that criest to the king?
15 And David said to Abner, Art not thou a valiant man? and who is like to thee in Israel? wherefore then hast thou not kept thy lord the king? for there came one of the people in to destroy the king thy lord.
16 This thing is not good that thou hast done. As the LORD liveth, ye are worthy to die, because ye have not kept your master, the LORD's anointed. And now see where the king's spear is, and the cruse of water that was at his bolster.
17 And Saul knew David's voice, and said, Is this thy voice, my son David? And David said, It is my voice, my lord, O king.
18 And he said, Wherefore doth my lord thus pursue after his servant? for what have I done? or what evil is in mine hand?
19 Now therefore, I pray thee, let my lord the king hear the words of his servant. If the LORD have stirred thee up against me, let him accept an offering: but if they be the children of men, cursed be they before the LORD; for they have driven me out this day from abiding in the inheritance of the LORD, saying, Go, serve other gods.
20 Now therefore, let not my blood fall to the earth before the face of the LORD: for the king of Israel is come out to seek a flea, as when one doth hunt a partridge in the mountains.
21 Then said Saul, I have sinned: return, my son David: for I will no more do thee harm, because my soul was precious in thine eyes this day: behold, I have played the fool, and have erred exceedingly.
22 And David answered and said, Behold the king's spear! and let one of the young men come over and fetch it.
23 The LORD render to every man his righteousness and his faithfulness: for the LORD delivered thee into my hand to day, but I would not stretch forth mine hand against the LORD's anointed.
24 And, behold, as thy life was much set by this day in mine eyes, so let my life be much set by in the eyes of the LORD, and let him deliver me out of all tribulation.
25 Then Saul said to David, Blessed be thou, my son David: thou shalt both do great things, and also shalt still prevail. So David went on his way, and Saul returned to his place.